May the Second Be With You

Today holds a lot of wonderful things. That sounds cliché, I just mean like May 2 of this year holds a lot of wonderful things. Not anything deeper. 

Today is Carmelina Moscato’s 31st birthday. She’s old as shit. She makes me feel young and cool and hip and proud to have woken up like this. Carm is one of those people that everyone knows. I’ve had countless conversations where Carm’s name has come up and I’ve had to text her being like “how the hell do you know so and so?” – her response is usually something like “oh we hung out one time…” Then I’m sitting there thinking, ONE TIME? It seems like she’s known you your whole life. 

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My April Fools' Day

Today when I woke up I had to put on a show for myself. I had to look in the mirror and smile when it wasn’t that easy to smile. I had to force a bounce in my step and make sure I had a song playing in my head as much as possible. Luckily my roommate, Tori Huster, was in on it with me (without realizing it) and when we were the only two in the locker room this morning, we belted out Cher as loud as we could. We even looked up some of her dance moves and grooved our little hearts out. 

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'Tis the Season

The NWSL season has officially kicked off in the form of preseason training camps. For anyone who doesn’t know what preseason means, it means the season before the season. Life as a soccer player is literally just seasons before seasons before seasons. We have offseason, pre-preseason, preseason, season, post-season. It’s ridiculous. There are times where I cannot precisely identify which time period I’m in.

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That's What You Get

As the 2015 NWSL season approaches, every possible thought and emotion plays out in my mind. Excitement is evident. Nerves are natural. The reality of being back on the field with players I didn’t get the opportunity to compete with last year is at the forefront of my thoughts. Wondering how Mark Parsons and the Washington Spirit plan on promoting my comeback tour is a close second. (Nine cities over six months. Free headbands at the entrance. Long intros and ) 

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Nothing Changed At All

Sometimes I just need a song to help me organize my thoughts. Because despite my best efforts, usually someone else can say it better than I can. In this case, Bastille – Pompeii – “but if you close your eyes, does it almost feel like nothing changed at all… and if you close your eyes does it almost feel like you’ve been here before.”

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I Choose You

I had an interaction with a sales man at a phone case store. He looked at my extra battery charger iPhone case (because I use it a lot okay. I have a lot of friends)

He said it wasn't very fun.

I replied with "It's functional. And you can't spell functional with out fun buddy."

He said he had nothing to come back with and with that I left the store.

My brother said that I was acting sassy. Maybe I was. But that sales man did not appeal to me in the slightest. Telling me I'm boring is not the way to my heart, in case anyone was wondering.

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Go Ahead, Jump

"All you're gonna do is jump up on this little step." "Okay, no problem"

"Whenever you're ready, go ahead."

"Okay."

As I stood an inch away from the step, loaded in the jumping position, I couldn't help but think of all the things that could go wrong. What if I don't land right? What if I tear it again? What if I tear the other one?

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Keep Your Standard

Hi. Did you miss me? Okay. I am going to write a blog now. I currently have some of my club players playing high school soccer (I won't get into this, but in Connecticut players are not allowed to play club and high school at the same time) and they are frustrated that the level isn't where they want it to be, but more than that, the commitment and desire to improve is different from their own.

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Think Like A Freak

I haven't written in over a month, yet it seems much longer. I guess time goes slow when you can only do some of the things you enjoy, and not all of them. But that's neither her nor there or anywhere. I've been able to read quite a bit in the meantime. Of the many on my current list, I just finished Think Like A Freak from the guys that wrote Freakonomics. (I liked it a lot) They talk about what it takes to think like a freak. Looking at problem solving from different points of view, learning how to say "I don't know" and many other things.

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Listen To Your (Brain)

As I've said in previous posts, I'm up for the task of experiencing every ounce of emotion that comes along with this injury. So far I have felt things that I have never felt before, and for that, it has been difficult. Every time a new emotion arises, I have to figure out what it is and how to handle it.

Recently I've been struggling with the idea that my body isn't listening to my brain. When I tell my quad to fire, it doesn't. When I tell my knee to bend, it doesn't. And when I tell my ACL to repair itself it just usually laughs at me.

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