Tell Them What's Up

So many activities. So little time to blog about them.

The cats have been coming over more than they're welcomed to. I go through cartons of milk unnecessarily. And trying to give them leftover salmon or chicken is obviously just not classy enough for them. They are so spoiled.

If I start buying cat food, someone needs to hit me.

In other news, the suns out in Hjorring. Big plus.

Because I was pretty sure the cloud over the town was just part of the population.

Anyway.

Yesterday we had another one of our weekly trips to Copenhagen to play BSF.

A few of us had to fly out early, because of scheduling conflicts, so I was one of the 5 am-ers with the two 19-year-olds. Although they may have a higher maturity level than me, I was stoked to know that I could name more U.S. states than them.

While sitting at the only Starbucks in Denmark (at the airport) I quizzed them on the 50 states. One had 10 written down, but put Florida twice and Los Angeles as one. And although she wrote "Vegina" and I lost it, because I told her that it is a body part not a state... she insisted that there was a state named "Vegina" and a West one too. I said - OHH VIRGINIA. Yeah.

It was even funnier telling our coach later. He knew that word too.

West Vagina is usually just referred to as the Hip anyway.

So, after teaching U.S. Geography, my good deed of the day was finished. Then it was off to our game. Which was in Ballerup. Which had a street called Ballerup Boulevard.

Trying to teach the Danish why Ballerup is funny to us, is funnier than the fact that Ballerup is funny to us. The word Baller is struggling to make it here. We really need to try harder. We need to Up the Baller status. Ya feel me?

After beating BSF 5-1, in which I didn't participate because of a sore knee (not serious, just being smart) we travelled back to Hjorring (which is a 30-minute plane ride- basically like if a plane could do a broad jump, that's the distance).

Since then, I've just been thinking.

I'm enjoying my time here. I like my teammates a lot. (Don't tell them) With that, I think it's also important to reiterate and add to one of my Life Lessons, that if you have something to say to someone you should say it.

But I think I made it seem like it was more of a romantic thing and it doesn't have to be obviously. See, as I said to one of my friends yesterday, there is a small window of opportunity to say things you want to say. Time goes by fast, people move away, things change. And you might miss that window if you think waiting is a good idea.

We think WAY more than we say. About situations, people, food, cats. But we don't usually tell the people we think about that we think about them. Or what we think about them (good or bad, folks).

I think I'm pretty good about it. I say what I think a lot. But I am going to make an almost-mid-year resolution to be better about it. So, if you hear some shit from me that seems to be coming out of nowhere... all it means is I'm thinking about you. And it may be out of the blue to you, but in my head it isn't.

Operation make life more badass than it already is in full effect.

Who's with me?

List of Ridiculousness

Life Lessons with Tiffany Weimer By: Tiffany Weimer

With a Forward by Tiffany Weimer

Forward

Warning: The following is mostly for fun. If you get offended by it or think I'm a piece of shit for writing it, I'm happy to sit down and have a conversation with you about life and the reasons I say things. Just let me know.

Chapter 1/1 Page 1/1 List 1/1

1. If something offends you, it usually means you're not confident about it

2. Life is not like a box of chocolates... otherwise we'd all be obese

3. Multitasking might make us dumber... but it also gives us the perception of accomplishment, and sometimes that's not a bad thing

4. If you're trying to master something, make sure you watch it to see how it's supposed to be done before you try to do it

5. Yoga is overrated

6. Scented candles are underrated

7. If you think about the past more than the present or the future, it usually means you're not over it. Get over it.

8. Tell people how you feel about them. The worst they can do is laugh, which probably tells you all you need to know about them

9. Leaving things on your to-do list means you ain't doing them.

10. Hangovers don't have to be as bad as we make them. Drink water before you go to bed, idiots.

11. Being a good friend doesn't mean you drink with your friends every weekend.

12. If you're sad, it's okay to be sad. If someone tells you not to be sad, punch them in the face. (Though that might make you more happy).

13. People always say your family is your rock. But they always forget to tell you how damn stressful they are too. Find your happy medium.

14. Eat whatever you want. The more you stress about food the more food will rule your life. Workout a little. Eat what you want. And don't go crazy in the process.

15. Make fun of people. If you don't have banter in your life, you're missing a huge part. Don't be too harsh. But make sure you're funny.

16. Talk about "uncomfortable" things. If you talk about them, they're not uncomfortable anymore. Diarrhea happens to everyone.

17. Yelling at the cars in front of you to go faster won't make them go faster. Save your breath. Save your energy. You'll get there when you get there.

18. Spend your money. You can't take it with you when you're gone. And if you're broke, your parents will help you anyway, duh! It's 2012!

19. If you are easily peer pressured, no one really likes you. They just know you'll do what they want you to do. Be your own person. That's what makes people like you.

20. If you're sad, it's okay to listen to Celine Dion and cry and eat ice cream. And if you're happy, well that's good then isn't it?

21. Being proud only looks good to you.

22. Your friends won't hate you if you don't text them back right away.

23. Just suck it up and drink water. No one likes it, but it's really amazing for your life.

24.  No one cares what you're wearing. And if they do, you'll likely never know it anyway.

25. Ask people how they're doing. Even if you don't care what their answer is, you will make their day, promise.

26. Your siblings are closer to you than anyone ever could be. Make sure you call them. Yeah, now.

27. Cool headphones do make you cooler.

28. Don't let your laundry pile up. Messy things = messy mind. Keep it clean.

29. You can't act like you know everything if you don't know anything. Read and learn. We have the internet! No excuses.

30. No, you can't live without coffee. Don't try to.

31. GO TO THE DOCTOR. AND THE DENTIST. GEEZ.

32. If anyone ever says anything bad about your mom, it is absolutely okay to hit them. Hard.

33. Work smarter, not harder.

34. Being afraid to ask for help or directions takes up so much more time in your life.

35. Wearing a backpack doesn't mean you're unprofessional. It means you don't take life too seriously and that's how it should be.

36. Please visit another country.

37. When in doubt - you can't go wrong buying someone Lotto tickets or scratch offs.

38. Don't let your life be a bunch of dreams in the making.

39. Don't take the road less traveled. Fly.

40. And finally. For now anyway. Love. Just freaking love everything that you love so much that you can't even handle it sometimes. Let emotions burst out of your ears. Don't let anyone ever doubt for a second that you love someone or something. Be bold. Be ridiculous. And in your face. And who cares?

Fine. One more

41. Don't ever let anyone forget you. Make sure of it.

Lost in the Danish Nation Translation

April 17 - means awesome Spring weather, beautiful grass fields and ... not in Denmark. We are still wearing pants, gloves and hats at training. The surface is muddy and hard. And well, yeah, I'm jealous of people at home in CONNECTICUT... haha yeah, I'm really saying that I'm jealous of the weather in Connecticut. FML.

Oh well  - Kelly Clarkson said if it doesn't kill me it will make me stronger. Yep. She did.

On Saturday we played a team with a long name that is definitely getting abbreviated here to BSF . We beat them 6-0 to put us back in second place in the league. Ballin. I scored my first and second official goals in league play and it felt good to find the back of the net finally. Even if one was a bouncing, bend down to reach it, header.

In other interesting news, we've had some fun with translation and new words for our Danish friends. After our game Saturday, SOMEHOW, it got translated that we had Wednesday and Thursday off to rest for our game Saturday. Later that night we found out that we actually have an important Cup game in Copenhagen against Brondby on Wednesday. So, as you can imagine, I quickly regretted the McDonalds and ciders I had after the game. 

So, that was fun.

Back to the name of the team we played - BSF - It stands for Ballerup something something. As Americans, seeing the word "baller" in anything gets us a little bit excited. I explained to our assistant coach why it made us giggle and what a baller is. Being extremely appreciative of anything witty, I was really impressed with his answer:

"I've been looking for 20 years for a word to describe myself, and I finally found it"

Haha. Yes. Amazing.

You're welcome Denmark. You now have a new word. Hopefully you'll all try to fit it into your life. If you need help, just let me know.

Things I learned in the last two weeks:

1. Danish money isn't monopoly money, so if you go to the casino and lose, you are losing real money

2. Cats here probably don't understand english

3. I feel so much safer riding in a car than on a bike

4. McDonalds is always really packed here and I couldn't remember that being the case at home... then I remembered there are like five on every street so it's nearly impossible to overcrowd one (there's only one in Hjorring)

5.  Don't discourage foreigners to speak english by laughing if they make a mistake... even if the coach says "suck balls" during training, you can't laugh.

6. And last but not least - try your very best to be positive. Things suck sometimes. Things suck a lot of times. You're totally in control of how you react to those bad things. 100% in control.

Alright  - done for today. Final words? Okay fine.

Take this to the bank:

Don't think you're better than us ? EH?

Six pounds of coffee later... Thank you to everyone who sent packages. Pretty awesome. I think I'm good with coffee for the rest of the year now. So, if anyone needs other ideas, I mean, I guess I can make a list:

Gummy bears Peanut Butter Fluff Easter candy Double stuffed oreos

(I know, I know, I'm such a health nut!)

Anyway, the blog has suffered due to my new extensive social life. Usually, I'm not one to socialize much. I don't like that many people. Yeah, big secret there. But I have friends here. Shocking!

Last weekend we (Lydia, me, the Aussies and one of our Danish teammates) took a trip to Copenhagen and Malmo. There we met up with Alyssa Naeher  (who somehow has more Twitter followers than me, so please don't give her any extra) - but she took a plane in from Potsdam for the weekend to hang out with me.

After a night out in Copenhagen, we went to Malmo to see Canada vs. Sweden and enjoy a mini Penn State reunion with Carmelina Moscato and Erin McLeod. Super fun. Even though Sweden beat Canada, it was still cool to see an international game live. Even if it was freezing. And Carm didn't get us box seats. Still awesome.

Regardless, the weekend was eventful. More so than the usual daily musings from Hjorring anyway.  Lots of travel, lots of laughs. Mostly laughing at the weird shit the Aussies say.

A few things I learned from the weekend: 

1. If I never learn how to drive stick, I'll never have to drive while I'm here :) (sorry Lyds)

2. Subway ingredients are the same here as back home

3. If you see a skum, you must distinguish them (easy enough)

4. I also learned more about this

old law

that I'm not really good at following (oops)

 After the weekend, we had to come back to run the Beep Test.

Which was like so fun.

We had a few training sessions and now two days off for the holiday weekend here. Apparently the whole town shuts down, so I had to stock up on Cup O Noodles and Coke. So, yeah, Mom, don't worry, I'm good.

What else?

We have our first big game on Monday. We travel to Copenhagen to play Brondby (the No. 1 team in the league). There might even be a stream to watch the game. Not to get anyone's hopes up. But if that's the case I'll post it on Twitter or Facebook for everyone.

(I'll be the one wearing a headband)

That's all for now. Don't miss me too much.

Peace, I'm outta here!

They see me ridin', they laughin'

Readers, forgive me, for I have not blogged. It has been seven days since my last blog. The events leading up to our first game are pretty insignificant. So, let's skip to the game and then come back to the other stuff if there's room.

Our first game was yesterday against Vejle. (Don't worry, I can't pronounce it either) The game was at 1pm and with Daylight Savings Time we had to be on top of our game, and we were. Promptly arriving to our meeting at 11:30am, we we made it through one of the toughest days of the year for any foreigner.

Aside from having to bike to the match for the first time in my life, up hill both ways, it was a gorgeous day in Hjorring. We even wore shirtsleeves during the game. (TAN! WOOH) In front of an amazing crowd of about 30 people, we didn't really put on the show we were expected to.

It's hard to say disappointing in the same sentence as win, but this one just wasn't good enough. I personally had enough chances to give a cheating ex-boyfriend an ulcer. I don't even know what if that makes sense.

But I definitely need to work on my finishing this week. And definitely need to adjust to the Danish style of play, which is extremely physical. Lydia was body slammed several times, in what resembled more of a UFC fight than a soccer match. She even had the dirt in her teeth to prove it. Instead of getting the wind knocked out of her, she got an entire hurricane knocked into her. (Again, no clue if that makes sense, but I don't like deleting anything in these blogs).

We have two weeks until our next game... plenty of time to work it out.

A few more things...

I am not bad at many things. Truly. I can count them on one hand.

1. Long-distance running

2. Short-distance running

3. Playing musical instruments

...and now we can add one more to that list - riding bikes. 

In the last two weeks I have fallen off my bike five times. You know that saying "fall 8 times get up 9"? Yeah well I don't know if I can make it that many more times. Like, if I fall again I don't think I will be getting back up on that bike. I am sure Lydia can attest to how bad I am, but after the game yesterday I got too close to a curb that was too high and had my worst fall with several tumbles, a couple screams, an ouch, ripped pants and a knee scrape. Like for real? I went the entire 90 minutes without getting a bruise or scratch, then on the ride home that happens.

Fail is right my friends.

Well, I guess that's all for now. I am hoping to ride in a car today, give my pride a break.  Ya dig?

Tak!

Tuesdays with Tiff? On a Monday?

Since I've gotten several requests to blog more often because some people lay around under the covers all day waiting for me to blog, I've decided to please my crowd.

But I will say this, you're welcome Simba, you big complainer you.

Last time I wrote, I told you about all that crazy things I've been doing while I've been here. And this one won't be much different. We had a scrimmage on Saturday against one of the top teams in Sweden, Linkopings FC, and we beat them 1-0. It was cool to get a win against a quality team, especially considering it was the first time we all played together.

What else?

Lydia and I have hung out with the Australians quite a bit the last few days. They have thick accents that are very difficult to understand. I think I'll have a better chance learning Danish before I can understand them. But nevertheless, when I do understand them, they're pretty funny and let me say, they are in desperate need of Twitter followers. Please donate your time by clicking "follow" for these two: Leena Khamis and Kim Carroll.

If they don't live up to being funny, feel free to unfollow.

Anyway, I finished reading Tuesdays with Morrie this morning before my nap and after shedding a few tears, quickly started to reevaluate.

What did I learn from reading this book?

1. Don't work your life away.

2. Put time into people who are worth putting time into and make their lives better.

3. Enjoy the little things (this is something I am a firm believer in anyway, but wanted to reiterate it) But what does it really mean? Well, honestly, I don't need trips to Bali Bali to have a smile on my face. I've been known to get extra super happy just by the sound of my mom's car pulling in the driveway or when Rock the Casbah randomly comes on the radio. You can actually make your own day by making things big enough in your heart to make your day.

4. Let love in. Don't close people off. Not everyone deserves your love, I agree, but there are many who do, and they deserve at least a chance.

5. Forgive. Morrie says forgive yourself for not doing things the way you wanted to do them and forgive others. Don't hold on to that anger. It will eat you up.

And I have something to add to this. Just my own bit.

I know that it's easy for someone to sit behind a blog and lecture. Or give opinions on the way life is supposed to be lived. But truly I just like to make people think. That's something I've done my whole life. Because I myself am a big thinker and I love what it does for my life.

The cool thing about life is there is no right answer. If I were to describe my perfect day, it won't look anything like yours. But it's about each person finding their perfect everything  - day, month, year, life. Their perfect person, place to live, job. And finally, the perfect dream to dream. If you can find that and not give a shit about what anyone else thinks, I think you've done very well for yourself. Not that it matters what I think. But what I should have said is, I bet you're pretty damn happy. And let's be honest, that is all that really matters.

You've got the whole world in your hands (yes, I was watching Con Air while I was writing this"

What's your perfect world? And what do you have to do to get there?

So many activities... well, not really.

Since the last time you joined me, a lot but not a lot has happened. If that makes sense. Training has been pretty intense. We have actually done quite a bit of running. Though most of it involves a ball. My trainer Mike LeGates once told me, "I could get you to run to China if there's a shot waiting at the end of it." Pretty true.

So there's that.

I have made several feline friends including a neighborhood filled with cats, which is amazing, and a Bernese Mountain dog that lives behind us. His name is Elvis. And he rocks. 

I told you a lot has happened!

I purchased what I thought was macaroni and cheese but actually turned out to be macaroni and WTF is this shit. That got thrown out. Then I had to bike to the gas station to get an oven-ready pizza. Failed dinner. So I drank a cider and went to bed.

Let's see. Oh. We went to the town swimming pool. Lydia and I. And I will definitely take pictures next time, because it's a beautiful place. With a freakin water slide. And no sharks. Which I'm pumped about.

Today we're going to do a coaching appearance for a club an hour away, which will be interesting because I'm sure not many of these kids have been coached in english before. And of course never by the wonderful Ocho of the U.S. Will for sure be updating about that.

For now I will leave you with this bit of info:

Landlyst 8 Box 151 9800 Hjørring Danmark

This is the club's address. If you care about me, this is where the presents should be sent.

Lastly, I'm reading Tuesdays With Morrie right now. Yes, for the first time. Fantastic book so far with a lot of great messages. My favorite though: "Let love in"  - it's okay to have walls. But make sure they're made of cardboard.

Ciao for now my little brown cows.

What's worse than snow? One thing.

Let's see, what do I have for you today.

Yesterday we had the day off. And I needed groceries. And couldn't get in touch with the Norwegian with the car, also known as Lisa Marie Woods. So, Lydia and I biked it to Fakta and had to lug our stuff back. I really felt bad for myself. I thought, oh life, why are you so difficult sometimes? Then I saw a photo of someone who had it a little worse, and changed my tune.

After we got our groceries, the snow began to pile up. I thought it was a joke, naturally. But it was real.

Eh, it wasn't that bad. We went out to shop a little. Found some new sweats. For those of you who know me, you know how happy new sweats make me. And for those of you who didn't know... now you know, reader.

After shopping we went home ... where I was able to wear my new sweats, light my new candle, and chill at my little work station.

I find it extremely peaceful here and even though I miss my mom yelling at me to make my bed sometimes, I kind of forgot what it's like to hear my own thoughts so often.

Like " Tiff, brush your damn teeth you lazy shit" or "No one else is going to do the dishes, you do realize this right?" ... ahh. Yeah, I definitely miss my mom yelling!

No, but on the serious. It's amazing to be able to reevaluate your life from time to time. A change of scenery totally does this for me. People probably don't realize how much they do from day to day until they are able to step out of it for a bit. Definitely something worth trying if you are more of a routine person. It's very, what's the word, reinvigorating.

Okay what else? This morning we had lifting with our trainer, Ashley. He is a very limber older man who reminds me much of a fitter, cooler Mr. Rogers. Except I'm not really digging his neighborhood. The gym isn't my favorite place. It's just not. I'd rather be on the field with the ball.

So, he was speaking Danish to one of the girls and I don't even try to listen when this is happening. As one can imagine I was off in my own world thinking about what I was having for breakfast... and their convo went something like "kadjfkdah;gajeiwjfdkfjdalkj beep test akfjdlkafjal;sfjdsal;"

Ermm. Excuse me?

My heart. My poor, poor heart.

So I asked one of the girls what exactly was going on... and lo and behold, we will be running that damn thing here. When I escaped from the U.S. I thought it was over between us. But nah.

Anyway, I won't dwell on it... today.

Moving forward. Oh, wait. Moving backward. It was pretty cold the other night after training. I showered and didn't want to take the towel off my head. So, I didn't.

Brrr. (btw how cool is my bike!?)

Okay. Today is nicer and the snow is probably going to melt. Which rules. Because we practice outside.

And I bought a coffee maker. So, if anyone wants to send me some Dunkin Donuts, I will accept.

That's all for now brown cow.

Swag? What dat?

Back again? Yep. How much more is there to say after a day?

Oh, there's always so much my friends.

Yesterday I woke up at 6am and realized how much more I can get done if I wake up earlier. I know, I know, most people do that on the regular, well, you know what, I'm impressed. It's not easy, but it is worth it.

So then I had more time for Yoga!!

Okay, I'll be honest. When I do my Yoga DVD (Yoga Conditioning for Athletes) I really have no idea if I'm doing it right. Oh well. I just like counting it as a workout.

So I have been doing the Yoga thing more often. Feels nice. And dennn. I didn't have to go to register as a citizen or whatever it's called. So, that freed up my already pretty free day even more. I was able to do a number on Our Game Magazine and girlsCAN Football, you know, my other jobs outside of football.  And if you didn't know, what the hall?

And denn. I have another American here. Her name is Lydia Vandenbergh. She probs needs some followers, so hook it up. It's nice to have someone who gets my jokes. And company I guess. But I'm sure she will be in this adventurous blog a bit. So, maybe I'll let her introduce herself one day.

And denn. We had training!

It was fabulous. We played for most of it. 4v2, 4v4, 5v5 ... just playing. It felt good. The air was a bit colder than I'm used to (well, I've been training indoors most of the winter, so a lot colder) but I'm getting used to it. We are still missing most of our players and will be until the weekend. Will be cool to see the whole team together.

And denn. (I think that is Danish for "and then" btw) (haha, just kidding. It's from the movie Dude, Where's My Car)

I met with the coach after. He was pretty awesome. Asked me questions like how do I like to be yelled at on the field and what I can bring to the team. He then mentioned how he wants the team to play like Barcelona, which I loved and I told him quickly I was the Xavi he was looking for.

We then talked a bit about confidence and having that edge to win and he asked about mine and I said "I'm American, winning is all I know... and confidence, have you ever heard of swag?"

He hadn't heard of it but said he would look it up and he was very interested in it! ;)

After the meeting it was a blistering cold bike ride back to the apartment. Luckily Lydia led the way, because obviously direction is not my thing. (while traveling, not in life)

No more and den!

Anozer New Country

I think it's time I start writing some more. So here's an introduction.

I just finished my first week in Denmark. Hjorring to be exact. With the line through the "o" and all. It has been somewhat uneventful in terms of physical activity. But you know that always means more mental activity! Yay! Thoughts!

I actually saw a quote on Twitter that I really enjoyed, but can't remember it word for word. Something about preferring to be alone with your own intelligent thoughts than in the company of stupidity. 

I hope some of my friends take offense to this and become smarter. Haha, just kidding. I don't think anyone I hang out with is stupid, but that's because a staple in my life is not being in situations I don't want to be in. People are always saying "ugh, I don't want to go to lunch with so and so" or "I have to go to this thing for a friend that I promised I'd go to" ... ahhh, insanity. I know we always have to do stuff we don't want to do, but people, it's okay to say no and not put yourself in situations where you don't want to be!

Okay, enough lecturing. Back to my thoughts.

I have been alone most of the time here. We've only had one training session. All the players are either at Algarve or with youth national teams. So, it's been nice to adjust at my own pace. I've had time to unpack and clean my apartment, cook some meals, get lost on my bike, drink instant coffee, take pictures of the gym equipment to plan workouts (got a lot of looks during that), enjoy my Yoga DVD, watch soccer for hours and hours on TV, use Danish words as American swear words (grocery store called Fakta = motha fakta), cringe while receiving texts from home (they're not free my friends, and I'm not responding), see the fees on my debit card from using it as if I was home and tons of other stupid shit.

Today, I will be getting some of the important things taken care of ... like registering as a citizen and stuff. I heard as soon as you register you are able to speak Danish. I am hoping this is true.

We have training tonight which is the highlight of every day. Soccer is the thing that makes the world go round. Well, my world anyway.

There will be more where this came from.

Ps. Forgot to mention that if you're trying to bring an electric/heated blanket overseas and think the converter will do the trick, no.

Sparks flew.

Electric blanket has become, simply, blanket.

Ciao for now brown cow.